Wednesday, April 22, 2009

12 year Shaheen Jafargholi Britain Got Talent 2009

Just a week after the world went literally bananas for meaty hip-wiggler Susan Boyle, Britain's Got Talent has just revealed a second clean-term singing sensation. The twist this time: It is a little boy with a funny name Shaheen Jafargholi.

Keep an eye on Simon Cowell's hands during this season of Britain's Got Talent. If there is a more surprising angelic expressions contestant with obvious mass-marketing appeal, we believe he may only have themselves a sneaky little rode under the table.




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Men are simple creatures. We like big TVs, cold beer and sexy ladies (preferably serving us cold beer in front of a big TV). And yes, all of the most successful female popstars were slender young things with boobies to drool for: Madonna (25 years ago), Kylie Minogue, Britney Spears and Lady GaGa. We are sure that any of these ladies will also make very successful lap dancers.

It's all changing now, though. If Susan Boyle, the woman who seems to steal the world's popheart this year was to give you a lapdance it would be a tossup which would snap first: your will to live or your femur.

Last week on Britain's Got Talent, Susan Boyle lumbered onstage looking like a drag club Bouncer wearing a dress made from 85-year-old-lady's Christmas tablecloth. After some milling chuck from audiences and a short break while a technician reset Simon Cowell's out-of-control spinning eyes, she sang. And boy, it was still not a bad representation of a terrible show tune.

Piers Morgan dribbled something about giving her biggest ever, Amanda Holden rubbed chilli flakes in her dead eyes and managed to squeeze a few tears out while Cowell was trying desperately to stop his renewal jaw and teeth erupt to reveal his dirty secret lyncanthropic .

The rest of the world and then spent weeks emailing clips from the show to friends with messages like "God has truly blessed us with this lady voice" and "Dude, check out the fat chick singin this shit. I am so gonna hook her up with you Bro !

While beauty-obsessed America is in love with the lady, as demonstrated by Entertainment Weekly's online comments section:

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